Sunday, June 17, 2012

Self-Serving

I don't know if my title is completely aprapro to what I'm referring to, but whatever. I'll change it later if I have to.

I was surfing the net this evening and came across some blogs making fun of this bride, who sang down the aisle for her own wedding. One article called it "The Worst Wedding Ever".



I watched it. I didn't think it was that bad. I mean, she has a great voice. She's pretty. I know the song. I get it. She doesn't have a father to walk her down the aisle, and this song fits perfectly in her magical little romance story. Cool. I didn't think it was the worst wedding ever. I mean, I am the kind of girl who gets teary-eyed at ANY wedding, but don't most people?

I watched it again, trying to find out why so many people thought it sucked. Here's what I came up with.

Well, for one thing, her husband didn't look all that surprised to see his woman come out with a mic instead of a bouquet. No one in the church looked surprised. No one stood up. No one was snapping pics. No one looked impressed or happy she was doing such an awesome job....on her own bridal march....at her own wedding. Then, there was that choreographed paced walk by her hubby towards her so they could meet in the middle and the whole 10 people watching could get a nice view of her serenade to their upcoming nuptials.

After the 2nd viewing, I figured it all out.

Well, for one thing, I'm sure she's a pro. Her voice is amazing, she has the cameras set up to catch her at every angle, and then there's that silly march down the aisle her fiance does to meet her in the middle, and the rehearsed hand-holding. Any sense of surprise or spontaneity is thrown out the window because I'm assuming people were expecting this to happen.

This is a sad, lovey-dovy song for Christ's sake! There should be tissues out and tears messing up make-up. Nothing. This is also a young, good-looking couple. Statistics say that people like this are supposed to have an entourage of equally young, good-looking friends. Where's the posse at? And another thing. It's her wedding! Why does she look so hard when they throw open those doors? no softness or tears or excitement. It was too.....cold. Again, it felt rehearsed.

Well, it all comes back to her being a pro, I think. I mean, think about all the awesome singers that get married. Maybe some of them performed some personalized song to their new life-partner, but not while they're walking down the aisle. That's usually reserved for a special spotlight moment during the reception. And I've been to weddings where a live singer replaced the "Here Comes the Bride" jingle, but I've not been to one where the groom or bride did it themselves.

I suppose it would be the equivalent of someone like me making my own wedding cake or birthday cake. Not only would it be the epitome of narcissism and blatant self-promotion, but what does it say about me to take on such a monster task the day I have to prepare for my own special moment- whatever that may be?

How do people feel about this sort of thing? I know artsy couples who do their own photography or their own artwork. Architects who build their own homes are often praised instead of ridiculed when it comes to their trade.

Someone had said that the spotlight is already on the bride the entire wedding. How much more accolades does she need to feel special? It reminds me of this chick that I know who made her parents rent out some ridiculous Sweet 16 space for a party they could ill-afford. It was very expensive. It couldn't accommodate all her guests. And it didn't have much of a dance floor. However, this girl was so determined to utilize the venue's Rome & Juliet style balcony and the catwalk and sweeping staircase in order to make her grand entrance with a bedazzled mic as she sang some song she had been practicing for months for this special moment. It's not that a girl shouldn't feel awesome on her special day, but that's just it. the say is special. the party is special. the custom-made dress, the food, the fancy invites- it was all special. Did the need of a gaudy grand entrance really worth the extra expense for the tiny space and her drama queen debut? I guess it was since her mom pretty much sold off jewelry and begged relations for spare change in order to pay for it all. Someone has described the whole fiasco as self-serving.

I'm not going to lie. I feel great when my pastries take the spotlight at someone's big day. I feel good. I feel special. And I feel like my efforts became a permanent part of a day that will exist forever in their memories. As time goes on, though, my eye has gotten better and I spot my imperfections more keenly than I used to. My stuff isn't magazine-worthy. They aren't flawless or perfect yet. And it makes me cringe and want to disappear into the ground. Suddenly, I don't feel so great standing in that fucking spotlight.

It's just strange, isn't it? No one demeans a bride who makes her own dress if she is a designer. Although, I've seen some homemade wedding ensembles and they were REALLLLLLY not pleasing to the eye. This wasn't the case, though, with this bride. Her voice kicked ass.

I guess, from my best summation, due to the lack of emotion, the lack of guests, and obvious uber-planning; maybe they don't have that many friends. Maybe she's a professional singer with a sensational voice but a shitty personality? I know, personally, if I wanted to gift my husband-to-be with an amazing song, I probably would have planned it a as a surprise and I wouldn't have picked the church as the place to do it. Then again, that's just me.

Lesson learned: I will NOT be making my own cake for my wedding or birthday.

5 comments:

  1. It looks like her man is waiting for her to finish so they can go get married, but she's milking the moment for all its worth. Tears? The man looks like he's about to burst out in laughter. Not for nothing and maybe it's a little inapropriate, but she just looks like a bitch to me.

    The reason no bride should be making her own cake is because it's supposed to be an awesome day where you get pampered and pretty and get to pay a lot of money for tons of photos to be taken of you. You shouldn't be up all night with a frosting bag piping out shells and whatever and rolling fondant. No bride should have to do that for herself. It has nothing to do with whether or not you think youre awesome enough to get the job done. Youve done weddings. Youre obviously good enough.

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    1. I'm good, but not good enough. Not perfect. And no one should get less-than-perfect on their wedding day.

      Maybe she's not a bitch....honestly, I got that impression she was a bitch, too, but I can't really pinpoint why. LOL

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  3. Why must we call this young woman such a nasty name on her wedding day? Maybe she was nervous. If she wants to be a diva on her day, can't she be?

    I wouldn't call it the worst wedding ever, either. i will say, though, what most people enjoy about weddings is the spontaneous bursts of emotions that overwhelm the senses. That's why so many people get caught up in the moment and that's why strangers cry at weddings. The video did feel a little cold to me, but we didn't see the before or the after of it, so who's to say what happened? Maybe they told everyone to stay seated and don't take pictures so her videographor could do his job unimpeded.

    With that being said, Kat, you ARE the only person in the world who found The Last Airbender by M Night Shalamaladingdong remotely enjoyable so I'm a little wary of basing my opinions on whether or not something sucked off your insight...lol...Still love you to bits though Katniss!

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    1. It WAS enjoyable to me for what it was, and no I haven't watched the animated series yet. So, maybe the movie did suck compared to the cartoon, but I don't have a point of reference. And I met a whole handful of people at Comic Con who liked the movie well enough, so I'm not the ONE person in the world who found it palatable. Stop calling me Katniss, unless you plan on setting me on fire. ;-)

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